LUX;

[goalsides]

Comments

[illuminance]

[ lux just - sighs and buries her face in her hands. memory sharing really is just unavoidably going to reveal a lot about her, isn't it. ]

... I don't know. I could have...

[ ... ]

None that felt right to me.

[goalsides]

I didn't think being a mage was a bad thing. [what the hell is going on here.]

[illuminance]

Magic is evil, where I'm from. The kingdom was founded on that belief.

[goalsides]

What kind of kingdom of light says that magic's evil?

Why?

[illuminance]

Magic is truly dangerous. The kingdom was founded by our ancestors fleeing from the havoc of a magic war. And magic has done irreparable damage to the entire world around us.

... It isn't for no reason.

Even my magic can ruin things.

[goalsides]

Yeah, but...that doesn't mean it can't be used for good either. Shouldn't it be based on what a person does with it? Not just an overall thing?

[illuminance]

... I want to think so.

But it might be too late.

[goalsides]

Might isn't the same thing as for sure, Luxanna. If there's still a chance to change how things are seen in the future, then...I just think...maybe it's worth trying.

[illuminance]

That's easier said than done. How do you convince a kingdom that a thousand years of history is wrong?

How do you do that when a mage just killed their king in the name of such beliefs?

[goalsides]

[well. he opens his mouth to answer that, but instead lux gets to see something else.]

[illuminance]

[ unfortunately lux's first thought is just: it must be nice to have so many people on your side.

and that it feels strange to see a memory with someone else she knows, too. ]

... What were you hesitating for?

[goalsides]

[ah. hm. you know this really does nothing to actually prove the point he was trying to make, but it's fine. things were different.]

...it wasn't as simple as Yamato made it out to be. But I couldn't explain it to him back then. I couldn't explain it to any of them at all.

[illuminance]

[ it looked like a pretty recent memory, but... ]

How long ago was it? Were you able to explain it properly, in the end...?

[goalsides]

A few months ago. [so she's right, it was recent.] ...I don't know if I ever explained the way I needed to, but it was explained enough to be understood. It didn't matter though. Our friends were still not to blame for what was happening.

[and back to here.] People just have to know it wasn't their fault.

[illuminance]

... I don't understand. You had people you could tell, but you still didn't explain the way you needed to...?

[ lux has always imagined that having friends would mean not having to keep so much to yourself. ]

[goalsides]

[...urgggh.]

It's more like...I didn't even really know how to explain it to myself back then. Things changed.

[illuminance]

I see...

[ she doesn't really seem to get it. ]

[goalsides]

[...he's doing an excellent job proving his point because he also doesn't quite know how to explain this, so he shrugs.]

Never mind. It worked out and things are fine now.

[illuminance]

That's... Good to hear?

[goalsides]

Yeah. [...but he's quick to change the subject.]

You never explained what your badge was. [there's a little nod to it.]

[illuminance]

It's the Crownguard family crest. Showing it is an easy way to gain access to things most people cannot.

Or it was back home. [ pretty useless here, but still. she's happy to have it. ]

[goalsides]

That's actually pretty cool. Like an exclusive thing. [it's also kind of impressive.]

...I kind of like the small reminders, at least. Like a way to stay focused on what to do next.

[illuminance]

Yes. I always find that remembering what I owe to my family and my people keeps me motivated!

[goalsides]

[hm.]

While it's important to think about that, too, isn't it just as important to think about what matters to you? Not just what you owe people.

[illuminance]

I do think of the things I owe myself, as well.

[ close enough? ]